Saturday, March 29, 2014

How to fix a bumpy story and make it flow

bumpystoryflow

My second chapter was terrible! I wanted to show time passing, and cover a few events along the way, but it wound up a bunch of disjointed scenes jumping for one place to the next. It's a balancing act, showing enough for world building, but without boring readers with unnecessary travel. (Unfortunately I’m a klutz and that’s how this chapter came off, clumsy.)

After working on it for a week (yes, an entire week for one 5000 word chapter) I've ironed it out quite a bit. It now reads more like a chapter instead of a bunch of scenes haphazardly stuck together.

Here’s how I did it.

~CUT SCENES~

First cut out any scenes that aren't necessary. I keep asking myself, okay I like this scene, but how important is it? I keep everything I cut just in case, but some things have to go.

~REARRANGE & COMBINE~

The next step is rearranging and combining scenes. Which scenes can be changed to go together? If I move this scene from down here, I can add it to this one up here, and ta-da no more jumpy scenes, but one longer one.

~SMOOTH TRANSITIONS~

Finally smoothing out the last of the bumps and making sure the transitions are clear. When there a change in time, location, or character it has to be obvious to the readers.

I added parts to make it continuous instead of lots of little scenes and some lines of narration could be told by the characters instead. (Wallah! (not sure how to spell that) Instant showing instead of telling.)

I have to keep telling myself, ‘this story isn't set in stone, I can change it.’ Just because I wrote it this way the first time doesn't mean that’s the best way to tell my story.

Curious what I did? Click on the image above for an example. :) (Note: I’m still not happy with this chapter, but it’s certainly better than it was.)

What do you think the best method is for showing time passing?

2 comments:

  1. I'm not sure, but I think you might be going for voila (with the accent on the "a" slanting down from left to right)...French sure is an interesting language!

    I've never really considered showing the passage of time. But, haha, maybe I should. Usually, I prefer to write continuous scenes so I don't have to worry about that and most of the books I read make time passage mostly implicit, so I just don't really think about it. But when I have to take it into account, I use new chapters. If I find a chapter is short because of this, I just draw it out for as long as I can =)

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  2. Thanks for the advice. Yes, I usually like continuous scenes as well, but traveling is slow on horseback and I didn't want to spend too much time on it. One of my problems was I was being too specific on how much time was passing. I'll have to work on being more subtle about it.

    Yeah, I think I was going for voila too. (I'm terrible with languages.)

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